Gifts in our Marriages


Holy Spirit


Pentecost (28 May) is a time of gifts – the gifts of the Holy Spirit to the Church and to all. How often do we think about using these gifts (wisdom, understanding, counsel, fortitude, knowledge, piety and fear of the Lord) in our marriages? They can all be applied to married life and help us to live our marriages in the image and likeness of the love of God for His people, the Church.

Wisdom helps us guide our thoughts and learn from our previous experiences. What previous experience has really helped me to grow in my marriage?

Understanding of our spouse is a gift we need every single day; understanding of how conversations, events and our words and actions can have a deep impact on them.

Counsel is the gift that helps us understand the will of God in difficult situations – is there a difficult situation in your marriage that you need to pray about and ask God to guide you in?

Fortitude acts as the glue that holds a couple together when the world tries to pull them apart. This can be in sickness, times of financial difficulty, anxiety, or disagreement. At these times it takes every fibre of our being to deal with conflict respectfully and hang in there.

Knowledge – we are talking about deep and true knowledge of our spouse. Is there anything you need to share with your spouse to enable them to truly know you? Have your brought expectations from your family of origin that affect your behaviours and attitudes in your marriage.

Reverence (piety) enables a marriage to be faith-filled. As a couple we may be in different places on our faith journey, or may not share the same faith, but we do share that instinctive desire of wanting good for our spouse, of loving each other and putting the other first.

Fear of the Lord – if we pray, do we pray for our spouse or pray together for us and our family?

Let us pray for the gifts of the Spirit at this time in the Church’s year.


Caroline & Michael L’Estrange